Saturday, February 27, 2010

How to Turn on Your Television in Ten Straight-forward Steps

For a fifty-something person, it is mildly daunting to decide to watch television on your new large HD screen and find that there are at least four remotes to choose from to get to where you want to go. So here is my strategy:
1. Pick up the first remote and push buttons randomly to see if anything happens.
2. Pick up the second remote and push even more vigorously.
3. Pick up the third remote and repeat above two steps.
4. Pick up fourth remote and repeat above first two steps. It is harder now because you can't see the buttons through your tears of frustration, and your hands are trembling.
5. Take all four remotes to the first person under 30 that you can find.
6. Don't let them have them. Make them come with you to the television and tell you which buttons to push.
7. Make them explain why.
8. Make them show you how to get closed captions.
9. Forget everything.
10. Next time, start again at the top of the list.

2 comments:

John Lynch said...

Do you want a cheat sheet? We could laminate it and keep it next to the television...

Lisa said...

What a great idea--especially the lamination. However, I am progressing. I've discovered that "all-on" button, which is helpful, as well as realizing I need to push "DVD" if I want that, etc. My current technological frustration is my computer--or maybe just my keyboard. I must need a new one, because I type and it only registers about every other letter--a real bitch when you're trying to get something done quickly. It took about 3 minutes to type this, and countless backspacing....