Friday, July 10, 2009
Hurry Up and Wait
It's the day before my son's wedding, and I'm at home twiddling my thumbs. The house is clean, the flowers are freshly cut, my dress is hanging in the closet awaiting me. I even got caught up on the finances and cleared off my desk. Anticipation is such a sweet joy. There's a little anxiety mixed in with it, and a wondering amazement that it all pulled together. I know it's coming, but I can't visualize it in my mind. Somehow when I try I'm somewhere near the middle section of the church on the right side--the groom's side. I haven't put myself up front as the mother of the groom. I can't see myself being especially escorted down the aisle to be seated. I can't see my other son and daughter standing up with him, or the other brothers doing their parts. I'm always still picturing someone else's wedding. It is unreal, but coming, and good. And there's no hurrying it, so I'm trying to sit still at the moment, relax, and patiently wait.